Skate Witches

Mash up

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Juggle Tings Proper

Larkin

This Be The Verse

They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
 They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
 And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn
 By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
 And half at one another's throats.

Man hands on misery to man.
 It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
 And don't have any kids yourself.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

87 My favourite shit

Alleged Examples of Teleportation

There have been many alleged accounts of teleportation, including Gil Perez, Sister Mary of Agreda, and the Moberly-Jourdain incident.

Gil Perez

On the evening of October 24, 1593, a Guardia Civil, Gil Perez, is said to have appeared suddenly in a confused state in the Plaza Mayor of Mexico City, wearing the uniform of a Philippine regiment. He claimed that moments before finding himself in Mexico he had been on sentry duty in Manila at the governor’s palace. He admitted that while he was aware that he was no longer in the Philippines, he had no idea where he was or how he came to be there. He said the governor, Don Gomez Perez Dasmariñas, had been assassinated in his wine cellar with an axe.

When it was explained to him that he was now in Mexico City, Perez refused to believe it saying that he had received his orders on the morning of October 23 in Manila Philippines and that it was therefore impossible for him to be in Mexico City on the evening of the 24th. The authorities placed Perez in jail, as a deserter and for the possibility that he may have been in the service of Satan. The Most Holy Tribunal of the Inquisition questioned the soldier, but all he could say in his defense was that he had traveled from Manila to Mexico "in less time than it takes a cock to crow".

Two months later, news from the Philippines arrived by Manila Galleon, confirming the fact of the literal axing on October 23 of Dasmariñas in a mutiny of Chinese rowers, as well as other points of the mysterious soldier’s fantastic story. Witnesses confirmed that Gil Perez had indeed been on duty in Manila just before arriving in Mexico. Furthermore, one of the passengers on the ship recognized Perez and swore that he had seen him in the Philippines on October 23. Gil Perez eventually returned to the Philippines and took up his former position as a palace guard, living thenceforth an apparently uneventful life.

This account has received wide circulation, but historian Mike Dash notes ^[10] that there are some problems with the story which call its accuracy into question. Perhaps most importantly, he notes that the earliest extant accounts of Perez's mysterious disappearance date from more than a century after the supposed events. Though Perez was supposedly held for some time on suspicion of witchcraft, no records of his imprisonment or interrogation have been found.

Sister Mary of Agreda

Sister Mary of Agreda was a seventeenth-century Carmelite nun in Spain who claimed that, while deep in prayer at her convent, she was mysteriously transported to New Mexico, where she converted the Jumano Indians to Christianity. When Spanish missionaries reached the Jumano in 1622, they found that the Indians were already familiar with Christianity, which they claimed was brought to them by a "lady in blue."

The Moberly-Jourdain Incident

Charlotte Anne Moberly and Eleanor Jourdain were two English schoolteachers who visited Versailles Palace on August 10, 1901. While seeking the Petit Trianon, they claimed to have been transported back to the seventeenth century. They published their experience in a book called The Trianon Adventure.

Experiments involving teleportation

Several alleged government experiments, such as the Philadelphia Experiment and the Montauk Project have involved teleportation. In the Philadelphia Experiment, the USS Eldridge was said to have disappeared, and transported over 215 miles. In the Montauk Project, scientists have purposely experimented with different forms of teleportation.

MAD DECENT

AM PLAYING AT THIS ON FRIDAY ALONG WITH MR MONEY AND OTHERS

time travel

There is no widespread agreement as to which written work should be recognized as the earliest example of a time travel story, since a number of early works feature elements ambiguously suggestive of time travel. For example, Memoirs of the Twentieth Century (1733) by Samuel Madden is mainly a series of letters from English ambassadors in various countries to the British "Lord High Treasurer", along with a few replies from the British Foreign Office, all purportedly written in 1997 and 1998 and describing the conditions of that era.^[2] However, the framing story is that these letters were actual documents given to the narrator by his guardian angel one night in 1728; for this reason, Paul Alkon suggests in his book Origins of Futuristic Fiction that "the first time-traveler in English literature is a guardian angel who returns with state documents from 1998 to the year 1728",^[3] although the book does not explicitly show how the angel obtained these documents. Alkon later qualifies this by writing "It would be stretching our generosity to praise Madden for being the first to show a traveler arriving from the future", but also says that Madden "deserves recognition as the first to toy with the rich idea of time-travel in the form of an artifact sent backwards from the future to be discovered in the present."^[2]

Louis-Sébastien Mercier's L'An 2440, rêve s'il en fut jamais ("The Year 2440: A Dream If Ever There Was One") is a utopian novel set in the year 2440. An extremely popular work (it went through twenty-five editions after its first appearance in 1771), the work describes the adventures of an unnamed man, who, after engaging in a heated discussion with a philosopher friend about the injustices of Paris, falls asleep and finds himself in a Paris of the future. Robert Darnton writes that "despite its self-proclaimed character of fantasy...L'An 2440 demanded to be read as a serious guidebook to the future." [Robert Darnton, The Forbidden Best-Sellers of Pre-Revolutionary France (New York: W.W. Norton, 1996), 120.]

In the science fiction anthology Far Boundaries (1951), the editor August Derleth identifies the short story "Missing One's Coach: An Anachronism", written for the Dublin Literary Magazine by an anonymous author in 1838, as a very early time travel story.^[4] In this story, the narrator is waiting under a tree to be picked up by a coach which will take him out of Newcastle, when he suddenly finds himself transported back over a thousand years, where he encounters the Venerable Bede in a monastery, and gives him somewhat ironic explanations of the developments of the coming centuries. It is never entirely clear whether these events actually occurred or were merely a dream — the narrator says that when he initially found a comfortable-looking spot in the roots of the tree, he sat down, "and as my sceptical reader will tell me, nodded and slept", but then says that he is "resolved not to admit" this explanation. A number of dreamlike elements of the story may suggest otherwise to the reader, such as the fact that none of the members of the monastery seem to be able to see him at first, and the abrupt ending where Bede has been delayed talking to the narrator and so the other monks burst in thinking that some harm has come to him, and suddenly the narrator finds himself back under the tree in the present (August of 1837), with his coach having just passed his spot on the road, leaving him stranded in Newcastle for another night.^[5]

Charles Dickens' 1843 book A Christmas Carol is considered by some^[6] to be one of the first depictions of time travel, as the main character, Ebenezer Scrooge, is transported to Christmases past, present and yet to come. These might be considered mere visions rather than actual time travel, though, since Scrooge only viewed each time period passively, unable to interact with them.

A clearer example of time travel is found in the popular 1861 book Paris avant les hommes (Paris before Men), published posthumously by the French botanist and geologist Pierre Boitard. In this story the main character is transported into the prehistoric past by the magic of a "lame demon" (a French pun on Boitard's name), where he encounters such extinct animals as a Plesiosaur, as well as Boitard's imagined version of an apelike human ancestor, and is able to actively interact with some of them.^[7] Another clear early example of time travel in fiction is the short story The Clock That Went BackwardPDF (35.7 KB) by Edward Page Mitchell, which appeared in the New York Sun in 1881. Mark Twain's A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court (1889), in which the protagonist finds himself in the time of King Arthur after a fight in which he is hit with a sledge hammer, was another early time travel story which helped bring the concept to a wide audience, and was also one of the first stories to show history being changed by the time traveler's actions.

The first time travel story to feature time travel by means of a time machine was Enrique Gaspar y Rimbau's 1887 book El Anacronópete.^[8] This idea gained popularity with the H. G. Wells story The Time Machine, published in 1895 (preceded by a less influential story of time travel Wells wrote in 1888, titled The Chronic Argonauts), which also featured a time machine and which is often seen as an inspiration for all later science fiction stories featuring time travel.

CURRYWURST

Currywurst is a German dish consisting of hot pork sausage (German: Wurst) cut into slices and seasoned with curry sauce (regularly consisting of ketchup or tomato paste blended with curry) and generous amounts of curry powder, or a ready-made ketchup-based sauce seasoned with curry and other spices. Currywurst is often sold as a take-out/take-away food, Schnell-Imbisse, at diners or "greasy spoons," on children's menus in restaurants, or as a street food.

Usually served with French fries or bread rolls, it is particularly popular in the metropolitan areas of the Ruhr Area, Berlin, and Hamburg. Considerable variation both in the type of sausage used and the ingredients of the sauce occurs between these areas, and there are disputes over where currywurst was originally invented and which version is the best. Sometimes currywurst is sold in food booth with a machine that will slice and spice with sausage. It is also sold as a supermarket-shelf product to prepare at home.

For decades, currywurst has been by far Germany's most popular fast food, especially among working-class Germans. In recent years its popularity has suffered due to the competition of pizza and döner kebab. Nevertheless, it remains easily available almost everywhere and continues to be culturally iconic.

Currywurst seems to have been invented in the post-World War II West Germany, although the exact time and place of the event remain subject to controversy. According to the Berlin legend, currywurst sauce was invented by one Herta Heuwer (b. June 30, 1913, Königsberg, d. July 3, 1999 in Berlin) when, while waiting for customers at her sausage stall in Berlin's Charlottenburg district on the rainy day of September 4, 1949, she started to experiment with the ingredients out of sheer boredom. According to the Ruhr-area legend, the sauce was accidentally invented by a sausage stall owner in Essen, who dropped a can with curry powder into some ketchup. In his 1993 novella entitled Die Entdeckung der Currywurst ("The Discovery of the Currywurst"), the renowned author Uwe Timm dates it to 1947 and attributes it to a fictional character called Lena Brücker, who ran a stall in Hamburg.

Early in his career German pop singer Herbert Grönemeyer, raised in Bochum, devoted a song to currywurst with lyrics in the typical sociolect of the Ruhr area.

Lamb

Tie its legs together, cover in afterbirth and hope for the best.

Ardfern

P.L

Sinking like sediment through the day
To leave it clearer, onto the floor of the flask
(Vast summer vessel) settles a bitter carpet -
Horror of life.

Huge awareness, elbowing vacancy,
Empty inside and out, replaces day.
(Like a fuse an impulse busily disintegrates
Right back to its root.)

Out of the afternoon leans the indescribable woman:
Embrace me, and I shall be beautiful' -
'Be beautiful, and I will embrace you' -
We argue for hours

11.04.08.GOAT.RUM.FRIED

P.W.B.C